FUNNY, WISE QUOTATIONS ON TAXES

Le collecteur d'impots

Le collecteur d’impôts Photo credit: Yelkrokoyade / Wikimedia (CC BY-SA 3.0)

Filling Out Tax Forms with Fiction Income tax returns are the most imaginative fiction being written today. (Herman Wouk)

The income tax created more criminals than any other single act of government. (Barry Goldwater)

The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. Even when you make a tax form out on the level, you don’t know when it’s through if you are a crook or a martyr. (Will Rogers)

The avoidance of taxes is the only intellectual pursuit that still carries any reward. (John Maynard Keynes)

There isn’t a rich man in your vast city who doesn’t perjure himself every year before the tax board. They are all caked with perjury, many layers thick. Iron-clad, so to speak. If there is one that isn’t, I desire to acquire him for my museum, and will pay Dinosaur rates. (Mark Twain)

They can’t collect legal taxes from illegal money. (Al Capone)

I am willing to barter my nudity for your love. That way the IRS can’t tax our transaction. (Jarod Kintz)

There are no withholding taxes on the wages of sin. (Mae West)

The IRS spends God knows how much of your tax money on these toll-free information hot lines staffed by IRS employees, whose idea of a dynamite tax tip is that you should print neatly. If you ask them a real tax question, such as how you can cheat, they’re useless. (Dave Barry)

Guide to the Perplexed.

This is a question too difficult for a mathematician. It should be asked of a philosopher (when asked about completing his income tax form) (Albert Einstein)

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